When I was a young, spry child (ie., 5yrs ago), I went running all the time. I ran because I had a crappy breakup that year, it was summer, I had just finished an honours degree (obligatory plug for Clinical Psych!) and because it made me feel like a magical gazelle who could traverse the landscape like some kind of wizard.
Unfortunately, (fast forward 4yrs) the day came when I was running a 12km trail and on kilometer 9 my knee decided to do this wonky thing where it popped and/or ripped off itself. Being stubborn, I decided to finish my run on my shitty knee because Dr. Ang Aint No Quitter, Yo! Unfortunately for me, by the time I reached the 12km mark, I was basically hobbling around like a pirate with a wooden leg… face all munched up like some kind of gargoyle. It wasn’t a pretty sight.
So I went home and I crawled up the stairs to my room (because my leg had given out entirely and I couldn’t put any weight on it whatsoever) and somewhat accepted my temporary demise as Magical Gazelle of the Backtrails.
I went to physiotherapy for a few months but didn’t find a whole lot of use out of it. Not being able to run and be one with the wild animals left me to resort to changing my whole lifestyle so that instead of epic fitness girl 4000, I just drank wine and smoked cigarettes and ate pizzas and chips and stuff. Also not a pretty sight, I’d imagine.
But then this year came and the snow started to melt and I thought to myself, Self! Time to get back out there and be awesome! So I went for a run. Didn’t pan out.
After a lot of griping and even more wine and smokes, I finally cracked and went to see a doctor once again with the hopes of a miracle cure. Alas, there is no cure for Chronic Shitty Knee. Ever see that Louis CK about the shitty ankle? That would be a pretty apt rendition of my doctor appointment.
Take up cycling or swimming she says… clearly unaware of my inner calling to be an awesome superhero magical gazelle wizard of the woods.
So I now have a (one year long wait via) referral to see an orthopaedic surgeon and get an MRI with, fingers crossed, the hopes for a surgery that will cure my Chronic Shitty Knee.
Wish me luck.
(Me in the future, hopefully!)
No comments:
Post a Comment
Comment